


Hot on the trail

by m_findlow



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-24
Updated: 2018-11-24
Packaged: 2019-08-28 14:15:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16724979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m_findlow/pseuds/m_findlow
Summary: John's missing phone is closer than he thinks.





	Hot on the trail

John's been tearing the flat apart for the better part of an hour looking for his phone. He's sure it's here, somewhere. The place is a bit of a mess, admittedly, but it can't have gone far.

Sherlock has been busily ignoring him, locked in a battle with his most recent case, a murder.

'D'you think you could spare me five minutes of your time to use your powers of deduction to find my phone?'

'Hmm?' He didn't even look up from his own phone. 

John sighed, clearly agitated. 'Phone, Sherlock. Goes ring, ring?'

'You mean you finally disposed of that God awful Spice Girls ring tone?'

John set his hands on his hips. 'A. It was Atomic Kitten. B. I'm amazed you've heard of either of them. And C. It was an accident. Look, can I just borrow you phone and call it, since you're clearly too busy. It's here somewhere.'

'Here,' Sherlock said, thrusting out his phone distractedly.

'Thank you,' John replied exasperated.

Seconds later he heard a muffled sound.

"The t.. ..s high, but ..m ho...ing on. I'm gon... be yo... ... mber one..."

John's eyes followed the sound. Straight to Sherlock's desk. He ended the call. 'Are you telling me it's been sitting in front of you this entire time and you didn't say anything?'

'It wasn't lost.'

John stormed over and snatched it off the desk. 'The screen's all funny. What did you do to it?'

'The victim's phone had a peculiar condensation between the glass and the interface unit. Could have been dropped in the snow and pocketed, but there wasn't sufficient heat to cause the water to condense. Besides it's January, where could you go that would be hot enough to cause it?   
The apartment had a pile of clean laundry, but no washer. Must have had it washed elsewhere. Would have taken their phone with them, but you know how these things go. Pretty girl gets chatting to East London wannabe rapper, and before she knows she's tossed in her jacket for good measure, phone still inside. She goes to give him her number and realises it's in the machine. She tries to get it out, but standard coin operated machines can't be opened mid cycle.   
Insurers nightmare to have the place flooded with water. A tumble dryer is capable of providing the right amount of heat to cause the water to condense but not to fully evaporate. Mind you, commercial laundromat dryers are able to operate at much higher temperature, thus the ability to get one's laundry done in less than two hours, resulting in less condensation left in the victim's phone, compared to yours.'

'You put my iphone through the tumble dryer to test your theory?'

'A theory proven is law.'

'What law says it's okay to take your flatmate's phone and put it through the spin cycle?'

'Don't be ridiculous. I had Mrs Hudson do it.'

'My insurance doesn't cover my phone! I've put up with bullets in the wainscoting, and your medical experiments in the fridge, but this is going too far.'

'Pine fresh. Frebreeze,' he said, holding the phone uncomfortably close to his nose, sniffing along its edges in a creepy way. 'We're looking for a laundromat within three miles of her flat that uses Frebreeze pine scented detergent. Come on John, the game is afoot!'

John sighed and pulled his coat on, following Sherlock's frantic bounding down the stairs, and pocketing the now somewhat useless mobile device. The replacement phone cost would be going on the bill to L'estrade when this was over.


End file.
